(I have to memorize and recite this for class.)
Eight pairs of sexy panties
so many pathways
to the cherry tree.
The bamboo
has two new shoots:
my lover's spagetti straps.
Tonight to drown my longing
I drink sake
from her seamless cups.
White birches
along the water.
Women in matching coordinates.
In this world
there are straw sandals.
Then there are bedroom slippers.
Our time on earth
high-cut brief.
From this planet
the stars only come
in small and extra small.
The crows lift from the limb.
Take off
your black thong.
Out of loneliness,
I try on
your blackberry brassiere.
Friday, April 26, 2013
Girl Code: Phone Etiquette
Cell phones. We all have them. We all use them. About a decade ago, they were rare pieces of technology that maybe only your parents had. Now, we can't walk out the front door without them. But the thing is, there's rules that go along with phones. There's understood things that you can and cannot do with a girlfriend's phone.
1) Don't hack her Facebook and post anything that she may have the reaction of "Oh shit my mom/work/grandmother can't see this!" and tries to delete it. That's bad. Funny joke? Ok. Racy sext from her boyfriend? No.
2) Talking about racy sexts, don't snoop on a girlfriend's texts. She's texting for a reason. Leave her be. She may be sexting the new boy she's seeing or maybe it's just an innocent text to her mom. Or maybe she needs to tell another girlfriend something that she's not close enough to tell you. If you need to know, she'll tell you.
3) Only answer her phone if she asks you too. So you guys are all getting dressed for a night at the bars and one friend's phone goes off and she's in the bathroom. If she yells, "Who is it?" look at it and tell her. She'll probably say leave it or answer it.
4) If she shows you a picture and hands you her phone unlocked, only look at that photo. Again, do you want to see some racy photos from her long distance relationship? I didn't think so. Stay on that page and that page alone.
5) If your girlfriend's phone is unlocked and you're at a bar, don't take this chance to be stupid. Maybe tell her "Hey, you should put a password on that." Don't let a friend text drunk. Bad idea.
1) Don't hack her Facebook and post anything that she may have the reaction of "Oh shit my mom/work/grandmother can't see this!" and tries to delete it. That's bad. Funny joke? Ok. Racy sext from her boyfriend? No.
2) Talking about racy sexts, don't snoop on a girlfriend's texts. She's texting for a reason. Leave her be. She may be sexting the new boy she's seeing or maybe it's just an innocent text to her mom. Or maybe she needs to tell another girlfriend something that she's not close enough to tell you. If you need to know, she'll tell you.
3) Only answer her phone if she asks you too. So you guys are all getting dressed for a night at the bars and one friend's phone goes off and she's in the bathroom. If she yells, "Who is it?" look at it and tell her. She'll probably say leave it or answer it.
4) If she shows you a picture and hands you her phone unlocked, only look at that photo. Again, do you want to see some racy photos from her long distance relationship? I didn't think so. Stay on that page and that page alone.
5) If your girlfriend's phone is unlocked and you're at a bar, don't take this chance to be stupid. Maybe tell her "Hey, you should put a password on that." Don't let a friend text drunk. Bad idea.
Thursday, April 25, 2013
Girl Code: The Rule of Boys
Your girlfriend and you both see the same guy across the bar. He's cute and he's smiling toward your direction, but have no idea who he's really into, you or your friend? The thing is, there's a rule of guys as far as who gets you.
Rule 1: Exes. Never ever go after your friend's ex. That is, if you value your friendship with the girl. No matter how chill she is about it or how over him she seems like she is, it's not ok. It gets awkward. At times, people will ask her questions about your boyfriend instead of you. The relationship will be strained as he won't know how to act about you two together. No matter what, no matter the attraction you have with the guy, STAY CLEAR. It's not worth it. It's really not. Girlfriends stick around forever (or they try to.) Guys come and go. Also, your friend will respect you a lot more if you stay away. If you go for it, it shows you really don't care about your friendship and are willing to throw it into the trash. Don't expect her to hold your hand while you cry or pour you a glass of wine when you break up. By that point, you've thrown the guy and your friend in the trash.
Rule 2: Boyfriends. Do I really need to say this? Maybe I do. DON'T YOU DARE GO AFTER A GIRLFRIEND'S BOYFRIEND. What the heck are you doing? What in the world is giving you the idea that this is a good thing? NO. Just no. 100% off limits.
Rule 3: Casual dating. Again, this is kind of like exes or boyfriends. Just don't do it. If she's already gone on a first date with the guy, just leave them be. If there's no chemistry, there may not be chemistry and as long as they didn't have sex or there weren't really serious feelings, maybe you'll have a chance.
Rule 4: Crushes. This is where the territory gets murky. This is back to the bar scene. Analyze your love life and her love life. Have you been on a couple dates recently while she sits at home drinking wine and watching rom coms? Give her a break and let her try. Opposite? Tell her. "Hey, you've had a lot of dates. I'd like this one." Establish it openly. If not, things can get confusing and miscommunication could rule all. Everyone appreciates a girlfriend just being clear. Maybe she smiled back at him, but she's really not interested. You won't know until you talk.
Rule 1: Exes. Never ever go after your friend's ex. That is, if you value your friendship with the girl. No matter how chill she is about it or how over him she seems like she is, it's not ok. It gets awkward. At times, people will ask her questions about your boyfriend instead of you. The relationship will be strained as he won't know how to act about you two together. No matter what, no matter the attraction you have with the guy, STAY CLEAR. It's not worth it. It's really not. Girlfriends stick around forever (or they try to.) Guys come and go. Also, your friend will respect you a lot more if you stay away. If you go for it, it shows you really don't care about your friendship and are willing to throw it into the trash. Don't expect her to hold your hand while you cry or pour you a glass of wine when you break up. By that point, you've thrown the guy and your friend in the trash.
Rule 2: Boyfriends. Do I really need to say this? Maybe I do. DON'T YOU DARE GO AFTER A GIRLFRIEND'S BOYFRIEND. What the heck are you doing? What in the world is giving you the idea that this is a good thing? NO. Just no. 100% off limits.
Rule 3: Casual dating. Again, this is kind of like exes or boyfriends. Just don't do it. If she's already gone on a first date with the guy, just leave them be. If there's no chemistry, there may not be chemistry and as long as they didn't have sex or there weren't really serious feelings, maybe you'll have a chance.
Rule 4: Crushes. This is where the territory gets murky. This is back to the bar scene. Analyze your love life and her love life. Have you been on a couple dates recently while she sits at home drinking wine and watching rom coms? Give her a break and let her try. Opposite? Tell her. "Hey, you've had a lot of dates. I'd like this one." Establish it openly. If not, things can get confusing and miscommunication could rule all. Everyone appreciates a girlfriend just being clear. Maybe she smiled back at him, but she's really not interested. You won't know until you talk.
Wednesday, April 24, 2013
Goodbye (for now) Kiss
Do I go for it?
Nerves go along with first dates.
How was I supposed to know what to expect,
what to think when you picked me up?
Things are different from text to face.
Your face, oh your face. That smile,
you weren't what I expected,
you were so much more as we sat
in the grass, cutting off the top blades
with nerves, working up to eye contact,
rambling on as the guy in the distance
flew a kite in the spring breeze.
But guys usually make the first move.
But before I knew, you had me hooked,
chatting about my childhood,
playing true or false in the coffee shop,
your hand on my shoulder blade,
protecting, sweet, (I don't think you saw me smiling,)
playful banter about your Elantra
and how my Impala could kick its ass.
You took me for me, weird was endearing,
my height, adorable, the attitude, cute.
"Do you want to...?"
Watching you navigate back to campus,
the silly side of me revealing itself
along with the touch of sass
which you asked if I was from decades ago
using sassy as an adjective.
And when we finally pulled into that parking lot,
I didn't want to leave.
I want to.
Nerves go along with first dates.
How was I supposed to know what to expect,
what to think when you picked me up?
Things are different from text to face.
Your face, oh your face. That smile,
you weren't what I expected,
you were so much more as we sat
in the grass, cutting off the top blades
with nerves, working up to eye contact,
rambling on as the guy in the distance
flew a kite in the spring breeze.
But guys usually make the first move.
But before I knew, you had me hooked,
chatting about my childhood,
playing true or false in the coffee shop,
your hand on my shoulder blade,
protecting, sweet, (I don't think you saw me smiling,)
playful banter about your Elantra
and how my Impala could kick its ass.
You took me for me, weird was endearing,
my height, adorable, the attitude, cute.
"Do you want to...?"
Watching you navigate back to campus,
the silly side of me revealing itself
along with the touch of sass
which you asked if I was from decades ago
using sassy as an adjective.
And when we finally pulled into that parking lot,
I didn't want to leave.
I want to.
Heavy sleep
My body sinks into the sheets as the aroma of vanilla and cinnamon fill my nostrils. The darkness spreads its blanket over my bed as my muscles relax and I sleep.
Tuesday, April 23, 2013
Girl Code: Homewrecking
When you tell most people homewrecking, they define it as trying to get with someone else's boyfriend/girlfriend. Usually, it's just straight going after the person you're hitting on. However, while watching MTV's Awkward, I saw a new type of homewrecking.
There is such a thing as homewrecking by spending too much time around a couple. It's a thing.
Think about it. The homewrecker spends enough time with the couple that their relationship is stifled. It's ruined because they didn't get enough personal time away from the homewrecker. As in the example in Awkward, the couple felt pity for the guy and let him third wheel. When truthfully, he was trying to tear them apart.
Personally, I wouldn't have thought this was a thing. It's not the immediate form of homewrecking you think about. It's another addition for the girl code. Leave people be. Understand when you've overstayed your welcome and when you've started taking advantage of a couple. Go get your own guy. Go hang out with other friends. Have your own identity. Living vicariously through a couple is just not ok. A couple is defined as two, not three. Your friends and the couple will respect you a lot more for it and will appreciate it. If you're really their friend, you'll leave them be and let them be happy. There does come a time when you need to accept that they're happy together and you are the one that needs to move on.
There is such a thing as homewrecking by spending too much time around a couple. It's a thing.
Think about it. The homewrecker spends enough time with the couple that their relationship is stifled. It's ruined because they didn't get enough personal time away from the homewrecker. As in the example in Awkward, the couple felt pity for the guy and let him third wheel. When truthfully, he was trying to tear them apart.
Personally, I wouldn't have thought this was a thing. It's not the immediate form of homewrecking you think about. It's another addition for the girl code. Leave people be. Understand when you've overstayed your welcome and when you've started taking advantage of a couple. Go get your own guy. Go hang out with other friends. Have your own identity. Living vicariously through a couple is just not ok. A couple is defined as two, not three. Your friends and the couple will respect you a lot more for it and will appreciate it. If you're really their friend, you'll leave them be and let them be happy. There does come a time when you need to accept that they're happy together and you are the one that needs to move on.
Stop Running
(a ghazal)
I brought him to my bed today,
wrapped us up in blankets today.
The rain I escaped batters on the roof
leaving my umbrella on the floor to dry today.
But the bedsheets rustle in the night,
He only wants my body, my kisses, today.
The wolf howls outside, missing her pack.
I only wished to be with my friends today.
I did this to myself, I brought him here
and maybe my love for those eyes will grow today.
Stop running away, Kaitlyn dear,
and appreciated what's in front of you today.
I brought him to my bed today,
wrapped us up in blankets today.
The rain I escaped batters on the roof
leaving my umbrella on the floor to dry today.
But the bedsheets rustle in the night,
He only wants my body, my kisses, today.
The wolf howls outside, missing her pack.
I only wished to be with my friends today.
I did this to myself, I brought him here
and maybe my love for those eyes will grow today.
Stop running away, Kaitlyn dear,
and appreciated what's in front of you today.
Peer Pressure
(a ghazal)
He pours the rum in my coke, just do it.
They set up the pong table, just do it.
She brings me outside, sits me on the steps,
a lighter in her hand, a pack of cigs, just do it.
He corners me in the apartment, towering
over my petite frame, locking me in, just do it.
Let's take an adventure, they said, going to the river
leaning over the edge of the bridge rail, just do it.
The professors never know, she said,
scribbling answers in ink on my arm, just do it.
Don't listen to them, Kaitlyn, they know nothing.
At no time in life do you have to just do it.
He pours the rum in my coke, just do it.
They set up the pong table, just do it.
She brings me outside, sits me on the steps,
a lighter in her hand, a pack of cigs, just do it.
He corners me in the apartment, towering
over my petite frame, locking me in, just do it.
Let's take an adventure, they said, going to the river
leaning over the edge of the bridge rail, just do it.
The professors never know, she said,
scribbling answers in ink on my arm, just do it.
Don't listen to them, Kaitlyn, they know nothing.
At no time in life do you have to just do it.
Thursday, April 18, 2013
The 'Fling
(For those that read into my poetry, this is completely fictional.)
It was Spring Fling. It was legal. The campus expected us to be a complete and royal shitfaced mess. It was ok to have
It was Spring Fling. It was legal. The campus expected us to be a complete and royal shitfaced mess. It was ok to have
bottles filled to
brim. A shot of run. Bodies
lay on rugged stairs.
I had lost count of my drinks. That was the first mistake. I had been crowned Champion of Beer Pong for the night. I could put that on a resume, right? But who is the boy laying next to me? I was not looking for love. His tossled hair screaming
sweat. Heated kisses.
Two animals on the Discovery
Channel, biting, mating.
What had I done? Had I remembered my birth control? Oops. Maybe it was time for a trip to CVS. The sunshine struggled to reach me through the blinds, light for the future. It blinded me as I pushed it away. The future hurt.
First Date
(a series of haiku)
Boy meets girl, take out
to dinner. Two fish numb in
the tank, motionless.
One hand reaches the
other. A match trying
to catch on a matchbox.
Drive home in dark, stare
outside window. Puppy at
door, hungry for love.
Final goodbye kiss,
sweet smile. Two toddlers swearing
friendship, forever oath.
Boy meets girl, take out
to dinner. Two fish numb in
the tank, motionless.
One hand reaches the
other. A match trying
to catch on a matchbox.
Drive home in dark, stare
outside window. Puppy at
door, hungry for love.
Final goodbye kiss,
sweet smile. Two toddlers swearing
friendship, forever oath.
Wednesday, April 10, 2013
Just a Faded Memory
(a sestina)
I starred into those hazel eyes,
but in those caves, there was nothing
only a miniscule glint of memories
on those lips lay all my past kisses.
So why do they question me like I am your girl friend?
They should be asking her, she has your heart.
I will curl up on my leather couch, Hart
of Dixie in the background, threading the eye
of my needle. I will go to bars with my friends
and drink, party and flirt like nothing
matters. That dark stranger will lay kisses
on my red lips. I will make new memories
without you. Sometimes I will flip through pictures, memory
bringing back the good and the bad. But my heart
has cleared. I now know many kinds of kisses,
I have looked into rainbows of eyes,
but I make myself feel nothing,
only some have become true friends.
I lean on them, my real friends.
We laugh over inside jokes, crafting memories
on drunken nights, but remembering nothing
the next day. The bar boys enjoy our heart
shaped asses as we fix our shoes, do not care for eyes,
only wish to feel our kisses.
But I can not live this way forever, kissing
the surface and skating through life with friends.
I have to look life in the eye,
mold my mind and shape my memory,
have someone quality help stitch my heart
and fill it with cheer, leaving nothing
behind to prick my skin, nothing
to harm my fragile kisses,
make me loyal, make an honest heart
out of me and find my best friend.
For I may recall you in memory,
but I no longer see eye to eye.
My heart will sing with sweet nothings,
a new set of eyes meeting my lips with a kiss,
a friend and rewritten memories.
I starred into those hazel eyes,
but in those caves, there was nothing
only a miniscule glint of memories
on those lips lay all my past kisses.
So why do they question me like I am your girl friend?
They should be asking her, she has your heart.
I will curl up on my leather couch, Hart
of Dixie in the background, threading the eye
of my needle. I will go to bars with my friends
and drink, party and flirt like nothing
matters. That dark stranger will lay kisses
on my red lips. I will make new memories
without you. Sometimes I will flip through pictures, memory
bringing back the good and the bad. But my heart
has cleared. I now know many kinds of kisses,
I have looked into rainbows of eyes,
but I make myself feel nothing,
only some have become true friends.
I lean on them, my real friends.
We laugh over inside jokes, crafting memories
on drunken nights, but remembering nothing
the next day. The bar boys enjoy our heart
shaped asses as we fix our shoes, do not care for eyes,
only wish to feel our kisses.
But I can not live this way forever, kissing
the surface and skating through life with friends.
I have to look life in the eye,
mold my mind and shape my memory,
have someone quality help stitch my heart
and fill it with cheer, leaving nothing
behind to prick my skin, nothing
to harm my fragile kisses,
make me loyal, make an honest heart
out of me and find my best friend.
For I may recall you in memory,
but I no longer see eye to eye.
My heart will sing with sweet nothings,
a new set of eyes meeting my lips with a kiss,
a friend and rewritten memories.
Monday, April 8, 2013
An Old Trap
(a pantoum)
Why don’t you love me?
I toss and turn, throwing blankets
my mind stuffed full of what ifs
scenarios of how things could be different.
I toss and turn, throwing blankets
but the dark peace of sleep never comes
scenarios of how things could be different
acted out on the stage that is my eyelids.
But the dark peace of sleep never comes,
Instead you haunt my dreams with your face
Showing up on the stage that is my eyelids
Voice saying, No. No it can’t be.
Instead you haunt my dreams
my mind stuffed full of what ifs,
your voice saying, No. Well maybe it can be.
But I do not love you anymore.
Why don’t you love me?
I toss and turn, throwing blankets
my mind stuffed full of what ifs
scenarios of how things could be different.
I toss and turn, throwing blankets
but the dark peace of sleep never comes
scenarios of how things could be different
acted out on the stage that is my eyelids.
But the dark peace of sleep never comes,
Instead you haunt my dreams with your face
Showing up on the stage that is my eyelids
Voice saying, No. No it can’t be.
Instead you haunt my dreams
my mind stuffed full of what ifs,
your voice saying, No. Well maybe it can be.
But I do not love you anymore.
Wednesday, April 3, 2013
Definition of Bitch
While in one of my communication classes for the semester, we debated the meaning of bitch. Was it still offensive to the girls in the room? How was it used in context? When was it ok for people to call someone a bitch? It got me thinking about how I think of the term bitch. A few years ago, it would have been considered extremely taboo. Bitch was for female dog breeders and that was it. Besides that, it was used negatively by rappers or people trying to offend. However, what I've found is that there is now three sections of a definition of bitch and they all range in seriousness.
1) "We're all bitches." "We're all whores." *insert random badass word here*
We all know the nights. We're kidding with our girlfriends. Maybe some drinks have been involved. We kid about everyone being a bitch. It has a childlike tone. Everyone knows that no one is serious. It's all just shits and giggles.
2) "Oh you're such a bitch, but we still love you."
This is the girl that's a hardass, but she's got meaning behind it. On the surface, she may act bitchlike and be a bit gruff on the seams, but inside, she just really cares for her friends. And it comes across. She can have a serious tone, but she can also joke about being a bitch. She accepts her role as someone that combines a badass attitude with sentiment and sweetness. She gets it.
3) "You're a bitch."
And then there are some girls that truly are bitches. They seem heartless. They have no reason to be outright mean to people. They may flirt with their "friend's" boyfriends or flirt with the guy at the bar that you've already called dibs on. They don't seem to understand that a girl code exists in this world. This is where bitch gets its offensive nature.
Bitch does not always have to be considered mean. It's not always derogatory. It gets a bad rap from being misunderstood. Sometimes, all it takes is a bit of a discussion of "how do you mean that" to clear the air. We just need to help it along and as girls, realize that sometimes clarification is needed.
1) "We're all bitches." "We're all whores." *insert random badass word here*
We all know the nights. We're kidding with our girlfriends. Maybe some drinks have been involved. We kid about everyone being a bitch. It has a childlike tone. Everyone knows that no one is serious. It's all just shits and giggles.
2) "Oh you're such a bitch, but we still love you."
This is the girl that's a hardass, but she's got meaning behind it. On the surface, she may act bitchlike and be a bit gruff on the seams, but inside, she just really cares for her friends. And it comes across. She can have a serious tone, but she can also joke about being a bitch. She accepts her role as someone that combines a badass attitude with sentiment and sweetness. She gets it.
3) "You're a bitch."
And then there are some girls that truly are bitches. They seem heartless. They have no reason to be outright mean to people. They may flirt with their "friend's" boyfriends or flirt with the guy at the bar that you've already called dibs on. They don't seem to understand that a girl code exists in this world. This is where bitch gets its offensive nature.
Bitch does not always have to be considered mean. It's not always derogatory. It gets a bad rap from being misunderstood. Sometimes, all it takes is a bit of a discussion of "how do you mean that" to clear the air. We just need to help it along and as girls, realize that sometimes clarification is needed.
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